PS. I am aware of having to move at the pace of the slowest person in the relationship. Unfortunately H, despite reading about and researching polyamory, with my support and guidance, and answering all her questions honestly, reached a point just over a month ago, where she refused any more information or discussion of polyamory. She became quite adamant that I was morally bankrupt and at the very least abnormal.
I realise that it often takes years for a mono-wired person to accept polyamory, but I honestly believe that H will never become accepting of it.
But, perhaps our having to continue cohabiting is a very good thing. I do hope that she may over time realise that my love for her remains untarnished and that my relationship with HO is not a threat.
I have been made to feel intolerably selfish for being unable to commit to monogamy - I will be quite miserable.
I also realise that NRE can be extended over a longer period in the event of LDR, but I do also know that my and HO's approach to our relationship is very rational, probably a bit analytical.
Any advice, comment, raps over the knuckles will be very welcome.