@Ray- thanks for stopping by. Yea...I think all relationships can be difficult to form. Even moreso when the lines of communication cannot be clearly established and maintained. I know that my couple so easily fall back into the 'dual'. I mean, they have been at it for ten years so I do see that; however, I also see that this is something they researched and talked about and consulted with their poly friends throughout the decision to actually enter into it because they are like that; however, I've voiced it the couple of times it has overshadowed the 3-partner relationship, as they requested. I just wonder how much of that I can tolerate and how much of me calling it out can they tolerate. What's funny is, this was never an issue in my previous experiences. I never struggled with finding a comfortable place in the relationship and being included so...I am grateful for the opportunity to experience a different component since it provides me with knowledge for the future.
I hope this experience helps you express your needs and desires clearly and openly.