Lately, it seems like after we all hang out on the weekend after I get home, I tend to get sort of down. No matter how hard I try to remember what a good time we had. Like I wish I didn't have to leave. Well, I do wish I didn't have to. I love getting to snuggle up with them at night and just laze around the house on sunday mornings. Just doing the mundane things. I wish I got to do that all week. I know it's better right now, esp. being secondary that I invest time into things of my own. Trying to enjoy life separate from them. It's harder knowing that they get to be together everyday but I don't. I wish I felt more content with what I do get to have. Sometimes, it just doesn't feel like quite enough for me. Then I feel like I'm being greedy. At least O decided to sleep in the middle last night. It just feels more equitable to me. Then I don't have to fret that A feels left by not getting to cuddle with him. I doubt she actually minds. I'm probably just projecting my thoughts. I do try pretty hard to be respectful of their relationship. Maybe I hope that if she sees how much I respect their relationship, then she'll be comfortable with more things. Or maybe I just think too much!
We did have quite a fun time on saturday night. Watched a hilarious movie, I laughed so hard I almost puked everywhere. And snuggling. Did I mention that I like to cuddle?