DH and I had alot of time to talk today on the way home from a football game. He asked me if it would be ok if he could have a whole night with just him and J. I was very happy that he felt he could be that open with me. And of course I said yes. I was just glad that he could come right out and ask me. We aren't sure when but I know he wants a chance at that so he doesnt feel rushed when he is with her. Its always a hard topic but I also recognize their relationship. I always said if I am going to do this polyamory thing I am going to see it through all the way and I am not going to half ass anything. That means I have to recognize other peoples needs and wants.
We also talked about many other hard things. Such as any wants and needs that aren't being met. There were some things in there that took some hard listening. But I would rather get them out in the open rather than keep them tucked in, worried about hurting the other person. I never want to feel like I am guilting him into being with me. It is something I am trying very hard at.
Tomorrow night I have already told him I have plenty to do outside the house so he and J will have time. It will not be the whole night because I have work in the morning. That will be a weekend thing. But since he and I are going out of town next weekend this will give them some time before we leave. And I am happy to do it. I have no doubt that keeping up their relationship has been harder than usual since we moved in. They are both trying so hard at keeping their spouses from going off the deep end with jealousy they haven't had a whole lot of time to focus on their love. And that was one of the big points we talked about.
I am off for now. TTFN.