Originally Posted by mumbles
Redpepper knows what she's talking about. You're your own person, but her "red flag" call was spot on with me. It lead me to face some personal demons and I've found myself changed.
Just a vote of confidence.
If you could clarify for me, please. This "red flag" is it a concern in general, or is it simply a red flag that C doesn't understand or subscribe to polyamory? I'm not even positive that I want to meet him myself- I don't really have a lot of worry that he's got some ulterior motive. There aren't many single 27 year old bachelors who are looking to steal a wife and four kids away- if all the facts are true as she's disclosed (and i've done wayyyy too much factchecking) then this guy is just along for the ride, doesn't want anything more than he's getting, since he has a perfect situation for him presumably (no committment, good sex, and someone who cares for him without it getting too serious).
Is it possible that this is just an "open" marriage we have, and that we really aren't ready for pure polyamory? Until a month ago I had never heard of this, so I don't profess to have a great understanding yet if it even applies to our situation. That being said, from what I've read on this forum and in other research, polyamory seems to be a pretty awesome concept... If she's not there but aspires for it, do I push for something that really isn't critical to me right now (talking to new guy)? Sorry, lots of questions :>