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Old 10-19-2010, 08:01 PM
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mumbles mumbles is offline
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It's true Red; starting to really think about others is a little frightening. But it's so rewarding...it fills me up a way that I've never really felt before. Or felt so very infrequently.

Men in general, I think, are just so horribly conditioned when it comes to talking about their feelings. Maybe some are better at it. But I've always been especially lousy at it.

Even early on in our relationship, me and C would so very infrequently talk about things that hurt me deep down inside. She used to really try - and sometimes she'd bust through, and it would almost be too much. Scenes of me crying my eyes out in a bathtub, come to mind...which is, admittedly a little dramatic out of context, but that's what happens when you hold things inside.

Those moments have been so incredibly rare for me. It's odd...if I was the only person I cared about, or if I was alone, I'd keep that all bottled up. But realizing that my partner feels secure when she knows what's in there, when she has the "keys to the whole house," as it were, is quite the incentive. Funny thing is, the act of sharing is so easy in theory; you think something, you say something. But when it's something close, and meaningful, then the act of sharing it becomes close and meaningful too.

I might be rambling on a bit guys, and I think this thread is closed-ish. I only keep posting and discussing because I'm excited, and it feels good.

Aaaaaaaaaanyway...hope everyone's having a good day, because I am.
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