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Old 08-16-2009, 02:09 PM
Quath Quath is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 504
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A common joy/problem in polyamory is NRE (new relationship energy). It can lead you to take bigger risks than you should. The rough rule of thumb is not to move in with a new lover, move away with someone or quit a job over someone until NRE has worn down a little. There are many bad stories of people getting in very deep into a relationship that works at first because everyone is in NRE. But as NRE wears off, things are not so good.

So there is some concern over that. However, this is just a rule of thumb to give the intellect time to catch up to the emotional. If you can lay it all down and have an exit plan, then I think you are doing well. It sounds like you are thinking this out very well, so I have a lot of hope for you finding a lot of happiness.

The only thing that sticks out is that you may feel that the univserse is setting up this arrangement for you. I think we just learn to take advantage of the changing circumstances in our lives. If you believe in the universe setting relationships up, I think you just also need to believe that it can teach you lessons through bad relationships. (I just worry that you may stick with something bad because you feel like the universe wants it to be so.)

I am sorry if any of this sounds disrepecting. It is not meant to be so. It is just concern. Once we know you better, we will understand your individualism much better and not make sweeping generalizations based on limited information.
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