First Date, (sort of)
I have a close friend that I've known for about two years, and have only recently been able to accept my feelings of attraction for him since my husband Macbeth and I have been talking about opening up our relationship. Yesterday, I had a "first date" in a way. This friend and I had recently been on a play date to the park with friends and were discussing favorite movies (he's a film school graduate). After getting consent from Macbeth, I texted my friend to see if he wanted to hang out and watch a movie together. I had interesting butterflies and excitement, although decided in advance that I would make no advances whatsoever and simply enjoy the time and be completely aware of my feelings.
I had an unexpected set of emotions, and would love to hear other's experience. I found myself feeling worried about Macbeth before I went over, really needing his reassurance that he was comfortable with this. I also realized I felt protective of my "other," that I wouldn't want to lead him on and then later have Macbeth feel uncomfortable and ask me to back out. Thus, I am keeping things quite platonic, enjoying the building friendship. But oh, the sexual tension was there! Macbeth and I discussed this, he reassured me that he is comfortable, and supportive of my continued pursuit and does not have jealousy. He and I made an agreement that I would feel comfortable asking about anything, and would accept his answer the first time without going into a needy litany of "are you sure you're okay with this." Vice versa, he absolutely promised to let me know immediately if there were any reservations.
In terms of the time with my potential, it was lovely and enjoyable with a perfect "lead in" to a conversation, that I let go for this time. He stated he was "really impressed that my husband feels comfortable letting me spend time alone" with him. It would have been a perfect opportunity to say, "we're comfortable with a lot of things," but I know I'm not QUITE ready for that, but almost!
I would love any advice or comments.