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Old 10-14-2010, 06:54 AM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: In Redpepper's heart
Posts: 4,742

Well, it's been a long time since I started this thread and we are now two short weeks away from me moving in. Lots of thoughts are going through my head. I'm concerned about balance between the time Redpepper spends with me and that which she spends with PN. I'm not worried about getting my needs met, I'm completely satisfied with anytime we get together, but I am worried that PN will feel it is unbalanced. We'll have to communicate and feel this one out.
I'm concerned about losing control of the space I am renting. It has to be my space first and foremost and a shared space second. I need it to reflect who I am. We are doing a great job shaping the space and RP is an incredible help with many things but there are times when I feel like I hurt her if I don't take her suggestions. We work through each challenge for sure. My privacy is a concern as my bed is not in a separate room but will be in the living room...this leads to increased anxiety about people visiting her room because they essentially go through my living space. I am a privacy nut so that will be a challenge that ultimately construction may have to address down the road. Oddly enough, I'm also concerned about my eating habits being sidetracked as I look forward to eating by myself in front of the computer and I enjoy limited variety in my meals both for health and routine purposes. I think we have a quick fix for that in having preset meals for the family as a whole a couple of times a week. I also want Redpepper to have more freedom within her space but it can't cost me my sense of isolation that I desire. When I imagine scenarios where people are using my bathroom or kitchen because it's convenient, it makes me question the sustainability of this type of arrangement. is my natural tendancy to think way ahead and explore the possible negatives...I'm trying not to focus on that

Now the positives! I love the space! It's clean, modern in many ways and has a rustic fireplace and chimney that have my creative juices flowing. I'm looking forward to not having to drive into town at the end of the night and really expect to spend more time together as a family unit in the yard and day to day. There is something very comforting about hearing them move around upstairs. Their son can visit me a lot easier which is very cool and I think it will give them more flexibility in doing things together. I also love the energy and smile that emanates from RP when she is in her room...she seems very happy for sure ...I love being able to have a kiss whenever too!

I'll keep you updated on my thoughts as we continue our adventure

Oh, and I am sure some people will wonder about "noises" in the house. I have zero issue with heearing RP and PN having sex...I want them to have more LOL! I need them to be happy and connected and sex is a sign of that for me.I will be concerned about him hearing us though, and I expect things will often be less "audible"

I'm going to try to be as honest as possible in sharing my thoughts because I believe this is a golden opportunity for others to share in the process

I am one very excited Vanilla Cracker
Thanks for inviting me into you r life and home Redpepper and Polynerdist. I love you both...just in different ways

Playing the Game of Life with Monopoly rules.
Monogamy might just be in my genes

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