One of the biggest gifts I ever got was from Mono about how he sees my body and sexuality. He told me when I met him, after a long haul of casual sex, swinging and dating many many men that I was a temple to him. That the privileged of being able to put his skin on mine was breath taking and he was more than honoured. He said he was sad that I didn't treat myself with the same respect.
These forums tell the story of how I got through much trauma around those days and my youth. You can read back if you like, but in a nut shell I was taught from early on that I shouldn't have sexual boundaries. No one taught me them. My worth was based on my sexuality and sharing, giving my body away. I know now what I am worth and even if I still was into swinging I would still know what I am worth and would only give of myself if it were to get ME off, not someone else. I missed this somewhere in swinging. I thought I was there to be masterbated in and used as a toy. I gave that to people willingly because I like to give.
I don't know what this young woman has experienced or where she is at, but at age 22 it worries me that she might be biting off more than she can chew and may just choke on it later. Who knows.
I would suggest that if you love her you should forget the sex part for now and show her. Tell her how much she is worth to you in other ways and how wonderful she is over and above how many guys she can fuck in a night. Anyone who has checked out of their body can fuck a bunch of guys, it doesn't take uniqueness to do that, but not everyone is special and unique unto themselves because they are them.
Start telling her all the things she does that make her special and BELIEVE what you say before hand. Don't do it to get laid. That would be the biggest deciet and lie. To me it would be like cheating and a breech of trust. Do it because you love her.
When and if she gives of herself in the form of sex, cherish it and treat her like the goddess she is, because that is what she is and deserves. To me, that would make all the difference between you and all the others. That is what won my heart to Mono. It was enough to change my entire life to welcome him in it. I would do that for no other unless they treat me better. The bar is VERY high now and unreachable I think.
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Last edited by redpepper; 10-14-2010 at 07:36 AM.