Yes, it is a good way to help gauge the other woman's intent. The question, though, was whether it was ethical to continue to see her without that meeting--and it is entirely ethical to not push the matter.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.