When I get insecure I withdraw into myself & inspect what the problem is from all sides.
I get to the two or three possible issues, it's always more than one root cause with me, and take them to Breathes. We talk it through. I'm more emotional, he's more logical so his input is REALLY helpful. With his logical viewpoint I'm more able to get to what the problem really is and find workable solutions.
I blog on my LiveJournal. Writing really helps me . I just let the words flow to my fingers & onto the screen. I don't think about them too much.
I'll go to work with the problem on my mind. My job doesn't involve a lot of interaction with others so I'm able to think on things and come up with possible solutions which I then take to Breathes.
There are as many ways to do polyamory as there are people practicing it!