It's amazing to me that I always find exactly what I am looking for on this forum.
Lately I have been feeling that it is not worth it. I hear people talk about how their relationships have grown from being poly....I already had an amazing relationship and we had/have amazing communication. I never looked outside my relationship for any piece that was missing. We both have the ability to love other people and we both knew that from the start of our relationship. We choose to practice monogamy for a long time, 6 years of it, and only opened our marriage up in the last 2 years.
I have had one failed outside relationship that lasted a year and many dating failures. He has yet to find someone that he truly connects with as he works all the time and we are raising three teenagers (ahhh the angst!!)
I find that deciding to date other people has taken focus away from our family; that the inherent stress and complications and constant communication actually detracts from having FUN with our family. Dating is hard and takes a lot of focus....at least for me it does. Sometimes I think that I have better things to focus on...my great husband and our great kids!
Note: take all this with a grain of salt....I have been bummed about poly for a few weeks now...