this experience i delve from my last poly relationship no longer active so forgive me....
I have lived with a poly boyfriend and his wife for a temporary time due to loss of home and lack of finances for half a year... he and i were involved and not she and i, a "v" with him being the bottom and she and i the hinges (i think i got those terms right? LOL) anyways ...I found a huge difference in the way i was with him then when with him and her.... i just found that really.....
it was just so much F-ing easier to have impromptu intimacies between us when was nobody but us around. and it is not cus i didnt enjoy havign her around,not cus i didn't like living with her, not cus i wanted him all to myself...not at all! but just...its so much easier to well bang the gong (sorry, im listening to that song as we speak...) when there isn't sumbody in the room .... least fer me.
i just enjoy my privacy. i crave the company of my loved ones, i loved the blended family but... after i moved out...i realized i also like..forgive me fer saying...just laying on the sofa in my lingerie watching tv in the evening b4 bed and then having my boyfriend drop by unexpectedly for a visit and just stroll right on in and find me and well..erhem.... nuff said ;-) anyways....
i have often wondered how after having tasted a relationship while in my own place how to keep that barrier of privacy and intimacy i enjoy while living alone and dating while moving forward to the goal of moving back in again and living all under same roof<--referring to any future relationships btw.
the only solution that seemed to make sense was separate rooms...hell a granny suite actually. a way for me to be a part of their home and life, but still have my own space if i needed it...and my own bedroom for me and my bf... and most importantly..... a room for my bf and his other significant other....so they can be alone too.
i think its important to share but also, have alone time too... you know? but that for me. everybody is different.
perhaps you are finding that, like me, you need that separation..that room of yer own, your time alone with each other in your own place while still sharing your lives under same roof.... ? if you are, there's nutting wrong with that. every relationship is different what works fer the goose doesn't necessarily work fer the gander, even in poly relationships! I'm sorry if i am wrong about what i said...
anyways i hope you work through this and feel better!
if i can leave on one note... keep the lines of communication WIDE open... you three chat it out, work thru this together... and i 'm sure u'll figure this out!
"...Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident." ~St Augustine
Last edited by Honestheart; 10-08-2010 at 01:06 AM.