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Old 10-07-2010, 01:52 AM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Oregon, USA
Posts: 1,437

So you are looking into a polyamorous relationship in which you would be poly and your wives would all be mono, is that it?
While it can definitely work, there is the chance that the women you would meet in our circles would be poly too, and not willing to be mono. Or mono, but already with someone (which brought them here in the first place). Still, good luck in your quest

I think the main difference between polyamory and polygamy is the law. polyamory is only about the relationships, polygamy is about marriages. From that, you're dealing with some legal problems as it's illegal, etc. In your case it would be polygyny, which is even more frowned upon as people assume the women are forced into it.
In my case, if I said I had two "husbands", people would be less likely to assume I'm forcing them (especially when they both happen to be 6'6" :P) and then if they talk with me more they'll learn that my partners are poly too - so while they're only in a relationship with me currently, the door is open to them having other partners as well.
And ideally we'd all live together at some point, although these things can be tricky of course.

I think because your situation is so close to the one that is often taking advantages of women, especially very young ones, it would be a bit harder for you. People would be more judgemental, and there are even legal risks. I hear even being married to just one person makes it illegal to live with another one as your spouse, even without a legal union.

But I also think shows like Sister Wives actually can show people that this type of situation exists between loving, consensual adults. And the more you hide, the less people will know it exists.

Either way, I wish you a lot of luck.
Me: 32F, straight
Seamus: My husband, 33M, straight
Fox: My boyfriend, 30M, homoflexible
Dragon: Fox's husband (and my ex), 30M, pansexual
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