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Old 10-04-2010, 04:57 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,872

I haven't read all of the responses, so hopefully I am not repeating anyone or behind the time. But there are two thoughts I have, and it depends on the people involved

1 - slow breakup... cauterize the wound before it begins to hurt to much. This may seem harsh but ending it instead of having a long drawn out breakup will begin the healing at a potentially better stage.

2 - The belief that all relationships are fluid - This reads well to me, and in fact I have done in practice, but it can be a painful process. Allow the relationship to go to where it goes, but understand that all relationships are fluid. To hold onto a specific relationship a certain way can cause heartbreak. I see a lot of this in long term poly's. Something of a zen moment I guess.

Neither is great, but both allow the person who is suffering to regain control.
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