No doubt you are trying to figure this out! Talk about a mixed message! I would think that eventually that kind of message would begin to wear on your feelings of self worth and self esteem.
I know plenty of men and women that stay in their marriages for the kids. Most are having an affairs rather than honestly trying to figure out how everyone can be happy. Good for her... and you, for trying to figure that out! Much more integrity and selflessness in how you are attempting to go about things. I admire that you are setting a good example for your kids too.
Look, as far as I believe and act in my relationship life, we can do whatever works for us. We have been handed a set of rules, put out by our culture, that says how we are expected to carry out our relationship lives. We can accept those rules or not, its up to us. There has been no other time in history where we have been able to throw the book out and decide for ourselves. We are lucky! It makes us feel good that others are doing stuff similar to us, but, maybe you could take comfort in knowing that you and your situation are unique, what we can relate on is we are all finding ways that work for us and supporting one another in that process.
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