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Old 09-29-2010, 07:13 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,872

Originally Posted by Roycroy View Post
My wife and I love one another very much, and we are affectionate with one another, but we don't really have sex anymore. She's a lesbian and has found a lesbian lover, and has proposed that her lover be part of our family. Her girlfriend gets along well with the kids and is very fond of me. She's a kind and good person.

My wife has said that she would understand if I needed a lover to be sexually satisfied--she has been expressly willing to pleasure me but is not really aroused by men. However I'm not sure that I want that.

My issue is with the fact that I'm worried about what the lack of sex means for my relationship with my wife. Have others managed a relationship like this, stayed married and been happy? Is it possible?
I don't know of any relationships like this, but I can feel for you. I am not sure my relationships would survive without physical contact as for me, thats a big part of my connection. I don't need sex, but there is an intimacy lost without it.

Are you interested in finding "love" outside of the marriage or just sex. It could be, on your side ofthe relationship, than poly isn't what you want but sex is. It really depends on what you are getting from the relationship.

And honestly, is she still giving you love? What are you getting out of staying in the relationship? Might be things to consider.

Best of luck on your journey

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