Thread: Nervous
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Old 09-26-2010, 05:30 PM
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SNeacail SNeacail is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
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Wow, this post sent me to some serious thinking and self evaluating. Thank you!

Originally Posted by Derbylicious View Post
I'm not sure how you learn to be your own primary. I'm not good at putting my needs first because I'm not very attuned to what those needs are.
I have noticed that this tends to happen to most women as soon as that "mommy" instinct is triggered. For most of us it takes years to overcome this and realize that we are neglecting to care for the caregiver to our children and they are suffering for it or at least not getting the best we have to give.

Originally Posted by Derbylicious View Post
How does one find time for self care and what does it look like? I'm not really into the pampering massages and pedicures and stuff. Mostly it just seems like a waste of money since I'm not sore anyway. I enjoy moving my body but I haven't been enjoying the derby drama that comes with being on the board (I'm not going to run for the board again, I prefer to just show up and skate). I also like small groups of company.
Sometimes it is just being able to decline being "helpful", especially when you know it will only add more stress to your life. When you are the one everyone goes to when volunteers are needed, they stop asking other people to help, so by declining, you are actually giving someone else a chance to say YES.

I like taking my kid to football, but I hate most of the volunteer jobs. I do have a job that gets me on the field nearly every game, but I only have to interact with only one or two other people. It is a very left brain type job and most of the people who like to volunteer hate it. It has none of the drama of dealing with a bunch of complaining parents. I seem to be able to do a good job at it and am appreciated for it, which make me feel good about myself.

Originally Posted by Derbylicious View Post
I know that for the most part I am a good person but I can over react to things from time to time without being able to fully articulate why it's making me uncomfortable.
I over react alot and it is really hard to hear your 15 year old son (who is also prone to over react) say "Mom, it's really not that big a deal. You are over reacting, everthing is going to be fine." In the moment, it is really not really appreciated when he does this, but when I am in my rational mind again, it makes me think.

Originally Posted by Derbylicious View Post
PS I got my period today so that accounts for some of the emotional rollercoaster.
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