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Old 09-25-2010, 09:42 PM
GroundedSpirit GroundedSpirit is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New England USA
Posts: 1,231

Thanks for more input Sage,

Originally Posted by sage View Post
........ you will see that while we accept we find actually being "comfortable" a lot more difficult. Likewise the mono/poly site but you probably wouldn't want to bother registering.
Ok, so here I see that in reality - you at least - haven't actually 'crossed that line'. In other words, it's still not where you would prefer to be. You're settling because of love you have for someone who has different views. But as you say, your're not 'comfortable' with it, would prefer it otherwise if you had a choice etc.
But at least you TRIED ! And that's something.
But, for example if you had a mono GF that approached you for advice because she had encountered a similar possibility and was at least curious, what would be your advice ?

From what I'm reading - and please correct me if I misread - I suspect you'd tell her 'don't go there - it's too difficult & painful'. Yes ?

this based on..........

Originally Posted by sage View Post
I would say that most mono women fall in love with a poly before they realise how the implications of that will feel. It's one thing to know it intellectually but a whole different kettle of fish to experience the emotional roller coaster ride. That was my situation.
Originally Posted by sage View Post
In both these cases we accept and try to make ourselves comfortable because of the quality of our relationship and the level of love we feel for our poly mate.....................

If we broke up I can't see myself knowingly going into another poly relationship.
So let's see if anyone else has stepped over the line and is willing to stay there ?

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