Originally Posted by ThirdWheel
To me (as a man) the act of penetration is not what brings intimacy to my relationship with my gf. Intimacy, IMHO, comes from a meeting of the minds. How close can anyone truly be physically is only a matter of a few inches. But true intimacy really comes from the mind.
The most intimate moments my gf and I have shared have not involved my penis being anywhere near her virgina. Just holding each other and talking all night, sharing our thoughts, hopes, fears, desires, etc., have brought us closer together than any of the penetration we've experienced.
Because of unpleasant life experiences, I don't see penetration with a penis as an intimate act either, unless it is attached to the RIGHT man. I was raped by a bf repeatedly when a teen, and again by someone I thought was friend years later. There was nothing intimate about it. But laying there at night with my gf in my arms, talking, laughing, cuddling, even just being in the room with her and sharing a knowing smile....THAT was intimacy. No one can take away that intimacy you have with your gf and no one can replace it, regardless of what differences their body has to offer.
The fact you're willing to listen to her desires and try to be open to them is a beautiful gift. She can be honest with you and you can, in turn, be honest with her. Unless something goes seriously wrong emotionally between you two, I don't think she'd leave you for a man simply because he is a man.