Any time I am compeditive with other men, it's good natured. Playing games, I can laugh and shake hands when I lose, no problems. At work it's pretty team oriented, so nothing like that there.
As for your other point, I do have anxiety issues. I can't have large groups in my home, for example, but I can do fine elsewhere, mostly because when I am out, if I get irritated or don't want to be in that situation, I can go home. When groups are in my home, I have nowhere left to retreat to. Usually I will sit and seethe in the bedroom till I can't deal with it anymore, and have to try to politely get people to leave, or drink.
What would be good coping strategies? I don't know how to deal with the anger and jealousy well.