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Old 09-23-2010, 04:48 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,723

I would suggest leaving the kid thing until later after you are done school, established yourself in a good job, paid off the possible debt school may cause because it seems that you were unaware of how much it might be and then have a kid..... all this without adding a poly relationship.

I have a child. They are not the bundle of joy that they are marketed as... who ever made up that saying was a grandparent I think, because they can marvel about how joyous it is that their offspring made a baby. Seriously, they are fucking hard work, more than you have ever experienced in your life or ever will experience in your life. School, work, ....nothing compares at all!

I would think that it might be difficult to stay stress free while in school anyways and why disappoint yourself if a child doesn't take? Relax, take your time, enjoy your studies if you love what you do, there is no rush...

I had a kid at 32! I am assuming you are young if you are in college. There is nothing but time for you and believe me, you will be missing your youth by having a baby. Enjoy it while you have it, because when you get to be old like me, you will wish you did.

So the boyfriend, I bet you ten bucks if you have a child with your primary that he won't be around for long. He will be completely out of the loop and unnecessary to you. I would suggest that you will be begrudging his demand for attention and intimacy as much or more than your primary. Baby will be primary, you will be secondary and there is really nothing left for at least a year but bossing others around to help you... and so it should be! You will need the help! I would be willing to bet my life on the boyfriend straying and finding someone who can give him some attention.

No, I think it best to wait. Who knows, maybe you can all move in together a few years from now and make a baby together. Figure out the support plan, all have jobs, and a firm grasp on the future, be enjoying yourself and be relatively secure and stress free.. By then you will know if your men will stay with you and can rely on them for anything you need.
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