I left out part of the argument where my friend called the concept of an open/poly relationship 'nonsensical selfishness' I had asked her to explain this...she really didn't other than to restate that a relationship where you can be married and be with someone else is selfish...I replied with "Expecting one person to settle for a life without all of their needs being met because I only want them to be with me is more selfish." her reply was "then why bother getting married at all?" I really really wanted to start in about monogamous marriages ending in infidelity etc. etc. etc. but restrained myself from standing on a soap box.
All in all, the argument actually helped crystallize my feelings on Poly. When I say that most conversations have been positive the number are about 10 or less conversations, maybe 3 negative. One of them, ironically was with a person in an open relationship (not poly, just open) and she had told me that I could not find an OSO or have her and others really believe I wanted a Poly relationship because I wasn't buying what I was trying to sell.
It was really true in the beginning, how could I convince people that Poly was a good thing for me if I didn't know it myself? That's really changed, and the argument this evening really helped me to codify my 'take' on poly, and my reasons for being in this with TP.
TP has said in her blog I could take it or leave it, and she's right, I could be a happy mono, but I could also be a happy poly. I choose poly because the pros outweigh the cons...I just never imagined I would be so strongly offended by someone challenging truths I didn't know I fully held before...so introverted growth all around then...
Polyamory is wrong! It's Multiamory or Polyphilia. Mixing Greek and Latin roots? That's wrong.