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Old 09-21-2010, 07:09 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: In Redpepper's heart
Posts: 4,742
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Quote:
Originally Posted by surfer View Post
People change, relationships change, and if there really are "irreconcilable differences" like one person wants monogamy and the other doesn't, there is no shame in ending the relationship and letting both people find another one that is a better fit. .
This is a very important point. There is no failure and should not be a sense of disapointment in one' self.

Quote:
Originally Posted by surfer View Post
Mono, you made a similar reply to one of my posts .....but deep emotional connection is hard to get outside of a romantic relationship, at least in American culture, it seems to me.
I know I sound like a broken record some times

I think I have a problem understanding what is this "deep emotional connection" outside of a romantic one that people are trying to chieve. I have this same problem trying to understand how Redpepper sees relationships. I think I am too simple in how I conduct relationships to grasp it.

- I have every day friends that I see everyday but when they are out of sight they basically are out of mind. If I never see them again it has no impact on me and I don't think about them very often. They have no access to information that I consider makes me vulnerable to them.

- I have family friends that I carry a concious concern for at all time no matter where they are...I don't need to be in contact with them to be fulfilled though, simply knowing they exist is enough. They have limited access to information that I consider makes me vulnerable to them.

- I have an intimate partner/Redpepper who I am completely open with and has full access to information that I consider makes me vulnerable.

Perhaps it is my lack of need for deeper relationships that makes it seem so baffling to me.

Sorry for the hijack
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