WOW! Great read. I think compassion and a place for understanding and advice and solace is all anyone on this forum is seeking. Fallibility is what makes an individual beautiful in my eyes, not perfection. Avoiding mistakes by listening to your grandfather in your head may have been the "right" thing to do; but every decision/action one may make/take gives the individual an opportunity to grow...whether it is to learn to trust one's gut feeling, or to learn a lesson from one's mistake (not just how to avoid the mistake- that is an obvious outcome) but to also appreciate the collateral learning. Know what I mean? You gained a new perspective and compassion for something you never directly experienced. Just my humble opinion.