I think the point of sex in a relationship is to feel that bond and to make eachother feel good. Now in your situation, it's a bit complicated, but I think he still just wants to feel that sexual closeness, and also he wants to orgasm.
my best advice is oral. Give him head, he gets off, your vaj isn't hurt. He may also be able to make u feel good, even if not cum, with some good tongue work. Or let him use the toy on you, tell him where you like it. It'll at least help him feel a part of your pleasure..
When one limits themselves in terms of love, they have missed the point of love altogether ~ RazeGeneration