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Old 09-16-2010, 04:25 AM
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Lemondrop Lemondrop is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Rocky Mountains, USA
Posts: 305

I think you're going to have to bite the bullet and tell your boy, gently but firmly, that you're getting married, that you are doing it intentionally and with a lot of forethought, and that you are doing it NOT ONLY for the medical benefits but also because you love your guy and want to be committed to him. Explain poly, if you haven't already, and reiterate that you love your boy, too, and that your relationship with him won't change. I think you're going to have to take the chance that he will run away again. I think that it's really important that you get those benefits, as medical bills can quickly pile up! And really, it's kind of misleading your boy to let him think that you aren't committed to your guy, like you might be misleading him by not telling him that you intend to marry your guy, whenever that marriage might be planned.
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