Originally Posted by redpepper
wow, you seem way more worried about the fact that this guy fucks your wife better than you do than the fact that you could get or give STD's to all of you and that he is a coke head and is juicing. I wouldn't want my child anywhere near someone like this. I would be really fucking angry if this shit was brought into my life. It would be a deal breaker... I think I would say end it or I'm gone and taking the kid with me. I have no tolerance for that kind of thing. Then again I don't get swinging or the whole open thing in terms of casual fucks. So maybe that's why.
I don't have any reason to call him a liar - so I'm not going to assume that he is one. There's also a difference between someone who has done coke from time to time, and someone who is a cokehead. I think, in regards to steroids, that most people have a strongly negative connotation with steroids, and one that is not entirely deserved. They can be done in a healthy manner, and often are. It is true that they can greatly damage your health if abused, and that some people experience rage and other issues with them, but they are in a minority. People who are well-educated on the subject tend to share my non-freaking-out stance on roids. Drugs are less of an issue to me if they're something that does not adversely affect the rest of one's life. I do also trust my wife's judgement - despite the fact that there's some things I don't like about this guy, I can't jump to conclusions, because nobody is perfect, and I'm no exception. My wife, in the past 12 years that we have been together, has always been a good judge of character, and I'm not ready to throw out 12 years of good decision making history over something that is easily blown out of proportion.
...I've also already come to grips with the drugs and bareback sex, at least for the most part - the revelation of his superior skills were a far more recent development, and something that, in congress with everything else, threw me into a tailspin. ...that make more sense?
Certainly looking at things from a wider perspective, it does seem a far smaller issue.