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Old 09-07-2010, 06:29 PM
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ImaginaryIllusion ImaginaryIllusion is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TruckerPete View Post
But remembering what I'd just posted I gave him a biiiiig hug instead. The smile on his face was wonderful! It feels a bit contrived to have to THINK to give him a hug or some other gesture instead of using words, (which mean so much more to me), but if I want him to understand how I feel, I need to do it in his "language".
Quote:
Originally Posted by TruckerPete View Post
Does it become more ... natural? It felt so wrong this morning. I mean, I knew he would feel the hug in the same way that I felt the thank you, but it felt like I was being manipulative or something.
Sounds perfect...you *are* manipulating...yourself...and you should be.
You're making concious changes to your behavior...to make yourself understood in his language instead of yours. Yes, that will take some concious effort for a while.
And you got the reward...a big wonderful smile...this is like classical conditioning at it's finest. I don't see how there'd be anything devious about trying to change your own behavior or communicate better.
Eventually it'll become just the natural way you communicate with him...and you won't have to think about it. Give it time.
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