View Single Post
Old 09-04-2010, 08:35 PM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,723

Hello rachelina, what a pretty name. I like that.

There are a few questions I have. Its sounds like the age difference is a concern for you. Does this woman have any goals to marry, have babies, career etc.? Because these would be reasons for this not to work out for the long haul or for her to want these things with your husband. This kind of woman is called a cowgirl. One that lassos a man away from a tribe to have him for herself.

Is she poly? Does she have other loves? She may find someone in her new town to fill her needs there eventually when their NRE wears off. Is your husband ready for that?

It kinda bugged that you say your husband says you should do research. Where is he? How come he's not doing it with you? And who says he knows everything there is to know about poly? Or is this how you interpetted what he said?

It sounds like you and them are doing everything you can do at the moment. They sound deep in NRE (new relationship energy). That sucks for you, but, it does die down eventually. Unfortunately with LDRs (Long distant relationships) this takes longer. With me and Mono it took about 8 months of crazy NRE and then it was a simmer for a long time. Still simmering after almost 2 years.

I suggest you AND your husband and this woman do some reading on here. Your story is not different than many people here going through similar stuff. You may find some solace in knowing you are not alone and some comfort in knowing how others have and are managing.
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote