Originally Posted by Tonberry
I think the best way to explain what I mean by I love you is "knowing you exist makes me happy". It means I want them to be happy, crave them when they're gone, and they're in a special part of my heart.
It's easy to love when it is returned. The most interesting time I ever said "I love you" was within the last six months.
I was on a business trip, and planned on seeing an ex. (With permission, of course.) While exes are normally exes for a reason, the reason this particular gent was an ex was because he wasn't ready for long term commitment when we dated, was military, and got posted. I loved him intensely at the time. We reconnected after he came back to the area, about a month before my trip, a few years after he broke it off.
At one point, we were sitting together, and I was simply filled with love for him. I knew he had strong feelings for me, but was 95% certain I wouldn't be hearing an "I love you" from him. I said it anyway.
He was a little taken aback. I explained I didn't need to hear it in return. It was just how I felt, and I was not implying a need for anything more than that moment. It was such a pure
moment for me, because I am normally fraught with "Will they say it too??"
He visited in the summer, and surprised me by saying it back. We kept in touch and frequently said we loved each other. It just is
and in no way diminishes my other loves.
He has since found someone to be with. I don't hear from him now, but I know that is what he needs. He's mono, and could not give her the attention she deserves if I was around to distract him. I have no negative feelings about this whatsoever. I know we could never work and simply want the very best for him.
My other loves are different, and also different from each other. They all run deeply, but I don't know why they aren't the same. Something to think on during a rainy day!