For me, honoring, respecting, and in fact holding the relationship of Redpepper and her husband above all else is a matter of loving both of them. This is my contribution to the strenght of our "v". I love both of them and thier son in a way that is not selfish or possessive. Thier growth and connection is internally more important than my own needs and wants in this. This isn't a sad thing, it is a profound sense of love I have never felt before.
Thanks for the compliment..Redpepper could still have done better, just a little bit of poly in me would have been nice. Sounds like you may have that.