Many moons ago, My husband and I had a intimate, caring, relationship with 2other couples. Of course we didn`t consider it 'poly', at the time, but it was.
We were suppose to be 'swinging-with-good-friends-only', but this was a closed, 6 person circle. We did things outside of sex. We were good friends, and our kids all hung around each other. I was totally in love with the one girl, and she, in me.
We never had all 6 people on a bed, but we did do foursomes.
It was awesome.
ANYTHING with sex can have a loving side, or a casual side. It depends on the energy between the parties involved, not the actions.