Thank you both for your insights. Sage, you offer some 'sage advice' in the loving her enough to let her go idea.
I have toyed around with the notions of love a lot, trying to figure out if those 'strong attachments' that I was feeling was 'in love', lust, love, newness or whatever. I guess that is what everyone here refers to NRE, when you can't really put a word on it.
When this all started, I remember thinking and citing, 'the more freedom you give, the more you get'. And believing that. The same can be said of love I suppose. It was such a different spin when she was the one into me, and my hubby felt left out. Now, that the wheels have turned and she is more into him, I find myself booking counseling appointments and reading up on jealousy and rejection. Basically trying to force this relationship to work by dealing! My logical side is fine with it all but the gut feeling comes in waves and is so strong.
Are there any tips or tricks to get past it? She has told me that she loves me but it is a different love than she feels for him. She also said that she does lust for me too. I 'think' that I can live with those two things, but I am not entirely sure.
Who knew that something so cosmic would turn into this? Any more advice is GREATLY appreciated.