It's been great reading everyone's comments. Things came to a head yesterday and I can honestly say that it was the worst day of my married life.
My husband fell to pieces and admitted that his feelings have spiralled out of control. He feels a huge amount of guilt and regret that he asked me to do this in the first place, which has caused me to discover that I want to have phone sex with another man.
If it was a complete stranger, he would be able to deal with it. What he can't deal with, is the fact that I have made friends with this other man.
We have decided to shelve the idea of having the 3some and he has asked me not to have phone sex for the moment.
But he doesn't want to take everything away from me, so said it would be okay for me to chat to this guy online, either through the forum, private messages or email, or Yahoo.
He knows that we will be having explicit conversations and he is going to try and relax about it.
The one great thing to come out of all of this, is the realisation that we love each other very much. After 23 years, things can become a little complacent and we feel very close to each other now, even more than before.
I hope that he can wrap his head around the knowledge that although I want to continue the phone sex with this other guy, it doesn't mean that I love my husband any less, or that I am going to want the phone sex more than I want my husband.
I guess only time will tell. Please keep your fingers crossed for me. I cannot lie, I want to be selfish, I want them both.