Well, it's complicated (could it be anything else?) Last night the four of us met again, and B paid a lot of attention--read into that what you will--to my wife and I. After some time B and I found ourselves in a long clutch, snuggling and whispering to each other. I worried that "don't you think H is going to feel left out?" and B said, "no, somehow I don't think so..." and I looked up to see my wife naked on his lap kissing him! B said "he never lets anyone sit on his lap"...turns out he'd asked her to!
But does that mean H is OK with everything? No, and neither am I really, or anyone else other than maybe B. You see, B has fallen for me. REALLY FALLEN. She's using the "l-word" constantly and she asked to see me at her workplace today, obviously without my wife or H. I was able to tell her, no, I don't think that's a good idea yet, that's going too fast. I think H is a little nervous about the pace of everything, and my wife is starting to be leery. She knows that B is in love, and she's OK if I am too ("I can't help how you feel" she said, and she's spoken very favorably about the bond between us) but she worries that the two of us might be spiraling a bit out of control. And I can't say I don't disagree. B just sent me a text saying "I can't believe I met you, you are more than I ever could have dreamed of, your affection is changing my life," etc. That NRE is a nasty drug, folks...I want to slow her down without pushing her away.
I DO think my wife and H will be OK with things but especially as the relationships between my wife and B and my wife and H are developing at a slower pace (although B did use the "l-word" several times to my wife as well). So...sigh. I can't count how many times my wife and I have said, "Well, now things will calm down, we've sorted things out." But B just keeps getting more and more wound. Of course, she has that power on other people too--so it's not easy to keep things under a lid.