Maybe I need a good swift kick and wake up call to tell me I'm being selfish? Or maybe I need someone to witness my life and say "you know, you don't seem to ever get space for yourself" acknowledgement of some kind would help at this point as I am feeling guilty about it as much as demanding. Please feel free to challenge me. I'm ready for anything.
A lot of people (including me) have a need for a space of their own. A place to feel safe and comfortable. A place to spend quality time with just yourself when needed.
Wasn't this your quote RP? "You are your own primary."
Sounds like you need some time with the primary that is yourself. Time to relax, get centered, and figure out how to take care of you
with all that's going on. And when you need that, but don't have a suitable space, it exacerbates all the other problems.
Anyhow, more *hugs* and hang in there.