Originally Posted by PNWSailor
So, I'm M, a married father of two. My wife ("A") and I are both happily poly, but with a fairly limited pool because we've never actively participated in any sort of poly community - just relied on random chance and very occasional online hookups.
I have to say I'm unclear as to what you're looking for by referencing occasional hookups...are you looking for a swingers group? We have members here who also swing in addition to having poly relationships, so perhaps they can point you in the right direction, if that's the case.
As for organized poly communities, well, those are fewer in number and trickier to find in many areas. Still, if we have other members reasonably close to you, somebody may know of a group or be interested in helping form a group.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.