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Old 08-16-2010, 07:27 PM
DazednConfused DazednConfused is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 119

Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
The trust needs to be that there will be NO secrets from your wife. He and your spouse both need to know that that relationship comes first. If anyone asks you to keep secrets from your spouse, immediately tell them that you discuss and share everything with your spouse and that anything they share with you will be shared with her.
He's never asked me to keep it between us, it's been assumed. If I want to say something just to him, I will tell him that. I believe he's never told me not to tell her because he wants exactly that, to make me the bitter bad guy and start allowing him space for egress...

Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
However, I agree with RedPepper here. Your descriptions of this situation just screams "teenage girl". She is acting like a spoiled teenager with absolutely no regard for the people she claims to love and wants to keep in her life. She wants what she wants, when she wants it and everyone else better stay out of her way.
Absolutely, she has determined this is who she is at her core, and she needs to persue it to be happy. I do not even begrudge her that, with the correct care and planning, with an unmarried poly guy (no girls yet - I'd lose my shit)
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