Ceoli, I joined more recently than you, and didnt see the dramas you refer to, where people felt too judged and left in a huff. (Except for last week, HMA and Violet and his seeming dismissal of her hurt at him putting the needs of a girl he's known a few weeks ahead of the feelings of Violet, his fiance.)
But this is a young board, and the culture here is still evolving. I suggest you look at what is going on presently, and not hold early interactions so close to your heart.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37