Originally Posted by YGirl
This may offend some people, but I'll be totally honest. I read some stories and wonder what I would do in the same situation. I read others and say to myself, "Thank gaud that ain't me." Still others I read and recognize myself at some point in my life.
True, that. There are times I ache so much after reading too many of the sad stories from new folks that I just don't have the stomach to try to chase down any of the threads where I'd like to follow the discussion. There are times I want to ask people "Why in HELL are you still involved with that person?!" There are times I despair over the whole human race because of what I read folks are doing to each other in what's supposed to be a loving relationship. It's spilled out into my FB status at times (and my ex-gf thought one status update was about her and the bad relationship she dove into after we split up).
Why did I decide not to stay away after getting my legs chopped from behind? This place helps people. Not everybody will be comfortable here--I've understood that from the beginning and have never made an attempt to appeal to everybody. Some folks won't like it because too many people disagree with them. Some folks won't like it because they can't scream and carry on as they'd like to. Some folks won't like it because they just don't like some of the most active posters. Some folks won't like it because they have a narrower definition of poly than other posters here. Some won't like because they have a wider definition of poly than most people here. Some folks won't like it because it's not a meat market. And so on.
That's OK. There are lots of folks who find this place useful and helpful and that's what keeps me plugging away mostly out of sight working to keep the dinner party going.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.