Put down the f-ing drink, put on your big girl panties, and get out there. Fuck. Wake up to whats going on. You are being USED. Move on, or join in....One or the other.
Side note: Sorry to hear about your mother. That really does suck. Get out of the bottle, and place your focus on that for the time.
Remember the saying "Absence makes the heart grow fonder"? Well, let her go....Then, ignore all her attempts to contact you for a couple days. If she makes no attempts, then ignore her for a while longer...Like a week or so. IF...she loves, you, she WILL be upset over this, and will wonder what she has done to piss you off. At that time, you let her know you are giving her what she has requested....Freedom to do as she pleases, and the downside is that you also get to do (whoever) whatever you please.
My wife L and I have done this to our couple we date. They have shown that they are interested in greener pastures in the past. So...We let them have what thye wanted....and left them alone....Less than a week went by before they were both texting asking if we were pissed at them. We explained that, yes...we were, and here was why. That kinda put an end to the issue, as they didn't realize that we were upset over it. We told them that they are free to go and do what ever/who ever they wish. However, if they wish to go out with us, or do things with us (on a sexual basis) then they need to le tus know that, and not forget about us when a "better offer" comes up. Anyway, enough about MY relationships.....Told you what I suggest. You know what you have to do....Why? Because you are THERE....But you can't make good decisions if you're drunk.