it sounds to me like you are doing great micaela! i have to say that the way things started out were probably pretty frustrating and upsetting for you, but you seem to have handled everything very well.
asking for honesty and openness is definitely the way to go, and it sounds like you have done that and your husband is providing that, although it certainly sounds like he could do some more in that department. you've been forgiving, but not to the point of letting him off the hook, which is great. in any case, you sound self-aware and straightforward, which are both excellent qualities in this arena.
i think you are doing just fine!