What possessed you to move into the backwaters? I was warned prior to moving to here that there were a few islands of civilization in the Sea of Kansas--and is that ever true. I moved first to Lawrence (wonderful place) and leaving the city limits even the few miles to Eudora was like traveling to a third world country. I've worked routes through many parts of Kansas and can't imagine living off one of the islands of civilization.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.