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Old 07-29-2010, 04:49 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: new england
Posts: 3,217

Originally Posted by RatatouilleStrychnine View Post
But why? What is it about passing on your DNA that makes you think that person cannot be "child free"?
Ariakas explained it. Thanks Ari for doing the leg-work for me.

If it is about "identifying like-minded individuals", then I understand even less. If you meet someone who has exactly your view, and shares all your opinions on the subject, but 15 years ago, they had a different perspective and had a child adopted, or donated sperm, what makes them not like-minded now?
I believe that being CF is something that is not an intellectual choice, but more like an instinct, much the same way that most people think that the "biological urge" to have children is also an "instinct" that cannot be denied. Maybe the term "like-minded" individuals was inaccurate in this context. It might have been more accurate for me to say "individuals with the same instinctive aversion to self-replication"? I realize that it is important to choose the right words and oftentimes I can be in a bit of haste to finish my posts. I tend to edit them a lot for this very reason.

Again, I invoke the "virginity comparison": If you had sex when you were unmarried and say, 17 years old, then you decided that sex before marriage is wrong, you're not a "born-again virgin". Once you have sex, your virginity is GONE - BYE BYE! The same goes for being CF. You can't un-ring that bell.

Interesting enough, someone on one of the CF forums agrees with you on this and suggested that if someone did the donor thing "just for the money" then she would consider them to "be" CF in practice if not in theory. I hadn't thought of that contingency previously, and it does give me something new to mull over, but I am still leaning toward my original stance.

I don't think that is what is happening. Your definitions are just being questioned because they seem arbitrary - that's all.
Indeed, my definitions do seem arbitrary and I don't have any problem with people questioning them. People have been questioning my arbitrary definitions all the way through this thread and I have answered every time. I happen to have a black-and-white viewpoint on this topic, but I am also willing to answer questions to the best of my ability.

Is there some law of the universe that says one cannot hold arbitrary opinions about anything? If so, would you please direct me to it? A Wiki link should suffice.

Last edited by NeonKaos; 07-29-2010 at 05:07 PM.
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