I think it just needs more time. She is confused and scared it seems to me and things are moving too fast for her now. Go at the pace of the one struggling the most I always say.
She seems to be struggling. Why not check with her. Ask her if she is struggling with the idea of having the two of you come together. I was terrified and elated all at the same time when Mono and Nerdist met the first time. I can understand that. Perhaps she doesn't think it's worth it and doesn't see it as being worth it to her because she is unsure if he is worth it to her.
Maybe she is losing interest and you are now making it out to be bigger than she now feels.... way to make your wife mono again! Be a super supportive husband that gives her the space to grow and learn and find others and be who she wants to be and then sit back and wait for her to figure out that what she thought she didn't have she actually had all along and it was just lost!
I'm just joking, but you never know right!? If nothing else you have the comfort and pride of knowing you have been doing the best you could possibly do by her and as a result yourself.
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