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Old 07-24-2010, 03:38 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,723

You don't have to rush to see them together. There is plenty of time. When you feel their is nothing left to do, because you are feeling good, then you could organize to all meet. Otherwise, sit on it.

The other part of that is that they will be just as nervous about seeing everyone together too. Empathizing for a moment on that one could be interesting.
If everyone meeting is coming up sooner than you might be comfortable, you can also ask it to be a hands off occasion whereby no one touches in anyway (except for a hello handshake or something). At the end of the meeting you could go and get the car and wait for her outside so she has a moment to check in with him on how he's doing.

For a time when Mono came over to our house, we would hang out together and then at the end of the night when Nerdist had said goodbye to Mono, Nerdist would disappear to brush his teeth and leave us to say our goodbyes alone. It worked well as Nerdist didn't want to see us. Also Mono and I needed a moment to connect and reflect on the evening and how we thought it went.

Remembering that Mono was going home and was not with me was important. He is the secondary, he doesn't get to be with me at the end of the night (except for two nights a week). Its important to have empathy in those moments and do everything one can to make it easier for the other (extended consideration). It all comes around. Eventually someone makes it easier for you and that is where the love and bonding grows
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