My boyfriend and I live 3 1/2 hours apart. We see each other one weekend out of the month. two if we are lucky. What works for us is having a routine and then adding extra when needed, never taking away unless absolutely necessary. We talk 4 times a day minimum. In the morning, for lunch, on my drive home from work, and then when we say goodnight. We have learned that we have to take turns having our "moments" when missing each other gets to be too much. That way the other can add in extra loving words and soothe fears and aches.
Some things that have worked wonders for us are pillow swaps. Asking for a picture when it gets really bad. When I go up to see him I wash all of my clothing including any clean clothes there so my laundry smells like him. I sleep in his clothing while I am with him and right before I leave I drown something of his in my perfume as a sweet surprise when he discovers it. The and last time I went I put lip gloss kisses all over his mirror which are clear but he can still see them and he has kept them there. We make sure that all needs of the heart and physically are met as much as possible. We have our "real life" talks, our "puppy love" talks, and our 'naughty" talks. We reminisce about our memories and we both thing of clever surprises. I like to so slide shows of every day things. I've taken pictures of preparing a meal from raw foods, chopping the ingredients, cooking, and then the final product. Hehe, I've done the same thing of getting undressed and taking a bath and all the way back into my pjs step by step. That one was great. He was playing video games with a friend when he started to receive them. He saves them in a file and hits the slide show button when ever he wants... I don't think he saved the food one though.
Those are mainly the things I do for him. What helps me the most are his words. His narratives of what he plans to do when he sees me again or telling me what he loves about me. I don't mean that I have pretty eyes or things like that. But deep personal things that I do, like how I squirm when when he's exploring my neck with his finger tips. When he says things like that I get tingles on my neck and I grab my pillow and wrap myself around it and I feel ALMOST like he is right there with me.
Its a big struggle being so far apart. Sometimes when I hear him talk about the fun things he's planning on doing it can be a downright knife in my heart because I just want to be there so bad. I have to really "lock it down" so that my longing doesn't turn into spitefulness towards him. Which I don't always succeed at, but he is very loving and understanding and we help each other through it. Through all of it... when it gets really hard. I remember that the bond that there is a reason why I allow the torture. Our bind is so amazing that it's worth it. Our song is Your love is my drug. " I don't care what people say. The rush is worth the price I pay. I get so high when you are near, but crash and crave when you leave."
Oh and we also write poetry to each other. It ranges from funny, sweet, passionate, to down right silly. I wrote one specifically for a hard night for him so he can go back and read it and know that my heart is with him.