Thanks autumnalnote. I fucked up on this one royally. I can see now how to go about things differently. Lesson learned. I've not come up against this situation before. Definitely a learning curve.
I think that really I should not of wavered wondering how to approach it. Either committed to saying what I experienced or just said I dated them. Its the waffling that has caused the up heaval.
No worries, when I saw things go array I kept my responses to wanting to meet and talk rather than email and kept saying that they had mis-read me and that I was sorry about that. Enough said. Its up to the now.
As for the ex, well he made up his mind long ago that I am a fuck head and is not interested in knowing differently as I think it pleases him to think so. Some people are just like that. They like to think negatively of people and love it when they're backed up. No doubt he is very pleased with himself because I just backed his opinion up.
We were really not a good match. I tend to think of those that are struggling more in terms of the fact that they are on their own journey and learning. I have empathy for them because we all are on own journeys. I am no different. I can empathize with their struggle and am willing to walk with them rather than beat them down even more with their mistakes. In giving to them I receive. I know people don't always have their shit together. None of us do. Its only human. This guy, my ex, thinks I should and likes to beat me over the head with the fact that I don't always at any opportunity. Unfortunately I give him opportunities.
I'm sure that he has had a nice long chat with my friends and they are all gloating over the fact that they are right and I was wrong. Meh, so be it. It kind of makes me laugh as I think its hilarious that they care that much to even bother! Oh I am so loved... In a fucked up way, they love that I am a fuck up in their eyes. Glad I was so entertaining.